Compared to most people, Tom and I don’t have a traditional marriage. We live in a condo without a white picket fence - it isn’t unusual for us to be working on separate continents - he's milk chocolate and Beatles - I’m dark chocolate and Stones. In other words, we don’t do Ward and June at our house.
While I would like to think that we’re special and unique, I’ve come to realize that we communicate like every other couple on the planet. Some things are universal. For example, he says exactly what he is thinking, while I have a more indirect approach. Tom recently admitted that it's taken him 25 years to realize that “whatever” actually means no.
Like most guys he likes to fix things, which means most of our discussions end with him giving me advice. Tonight while trying to explain that sometimes I just want him to listen, I realized that most men don’t even know what that looks like. In fact, I’m not even sure they have the necessary vocabulary for those kinds of conversations.
This gave me a brilliant idea, I should make a set of flash cards with phrases Tom can refer to during those times I really just want him to listen while I vent.
My list goes something like this:
hmmmmm
yes
wow
oh dear
and......
cool
really
how do you feel about that?
absolutely
Laugh if you will, but this could be big people.
3 comments:
You are so SPOT ON and it isn't hard to find a vendor locally to make those flash cards. I'll help you sell them via eBay!
Don't you think it would make a fun girls' night out sitting around a table, drinking wine, and brainstorming a whole deck of cards?
try explain make up , shoes , handbags ..... see if Tom can giving u any advice =D
Just found your blog - a friend passed along the address
Nicely written. You've nailed this male/female relationship thing.
Love the story about the missing scooter!
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