Around this time last year, I was hiking across England with a group of my colleagues, an odd assortment of Public Relations and Media folk. On that trip I had the great privilege of meeting Alicia Vargas Carney, a beautiful woman who touched my life. As we started talking we found out that we had a great deal in common; we were the same age, both married to men named Tom, each had a son in their early 20's, and believe it or not.... it seemed that each of our families had a much loved pug.
When you're hiking, you really get to know the people you're with. Over the course of our trip we talked about our families - the difficulties in balancing a career with life, wondering if it was possible to actually have it "all" - each day's cravings (usually a hot bath and glass of wine) - how plastic surgery doesn't make anyone look younger, just desperate - we discussed a multitude of things that make up one's life.
It was with great sadness that I recently found out that Alicia passed away of breast cancer. The irony is the day before I went on the UK hike, I found out that I had a lump in my breast. It gave me a great deal to think about, thank god it was benign. Alicia was full of life, much fitter than I am, smart and beautiful. How can this even be possible?
Like most people I don't spend a great deal of time thinking about my mortality - sure, we all know it's going to eventually happen - let's be honest, don't most of us live in denial? The other night, suffering from jet lag, I lay in bed unable to sleep, thinking about Alicia. The thought occurred to me, even if I'm fortunate enough to reach the full life expectancy of the average Canadian woman (80.4) , half of my life is over. A sobering thought.
The first thing that popped in my head was maybe it's time to buy a red sports car and trade Tom in for a younger man. After that moment of madness I took stock of my life, counting my blessings for this embarrassment of riches, realizing that I really better start living!
Rest in peace dear sweet Alicia.
