Around this time last year, I was hiking across England with a group of my colleagues, an odd assortment of Public Relations and Media folk. On that trip I had the great privilege of meeting Alicia Vargas Carney, a beautiful woman who touched my life. As we started talking we found out that we had a great deal in common; we were the same age, both married to men named Tom, each had a son in their early 20's, and believe it or not.... it seemed that each of our families had a much loved pug.
When you're hiking, you really get to know the people you're with. Over the course of our trip we talked about our families - the difficulties in balancing a career with life, wondering if it was possible to actually have it "all" - each day's cravings (usually a hot bath and glass of wine) - how plastic surgery doesn't make anyone look younger, just desperate - we discussed a multitude of things that make up one's life.
It was with great sadness that I recently found out that Alicia passed away of breast cancer. The irony is the day before I went on the UK hike, I found out that I had a lump in my breast. It gave me a great deal to think about, thank god it was benign. Alicia was full of life, much fitter than I am, smart and beautiful. How can this even be possible?
Like most people I don't spend a great deal of time thinking about my mortality - sure, we all know it's going to eventually happen - let's be honest, don't most of us live in denial? The other night, suffering from jet lag, I lay in bed unable to sleep, thinking about Alicia. The thought occurred to me, even if I'm fortunate enough to reach the full life expectancy of the average Canadian woman (80.4) , half of my life is over. A sobering thought.
The first thing that popped in my head was maybe it's time to buy a red sports car and trade Tom in for a younger man. After that moment of madness I took stock of my life, counting my blessings for this embarrassment of riches, realizing that I really better start living!
Rest in peace dear sweet Alicia.
7 comments:
Dear Mika - I'm so sorry to hear about your friend Alicia. It is again a reminder to live each day to the fullest while celebrating our experiences with loved ones near and far.
Love,
Dawn
What I find to be a strange contradiction about death is the finality of it. Even though my Dad has been dead over 12 years now, it still seems wierd to me...like he's just on a long vacation or something. Hopefully, we will meet again someday.
If you haven't read "The Shack", I highly recommend it. It's fictional, but an amazing insight into the afterlife...and how a bruised and angry man found his way.
Oh...I forgot another LIFE CHANGING book that's called "Same Kind of Different As Me". It's a true story about a homeless man, a rich man and the love of an amazing woman who brought them together. They are in the process of putting a movie script together with a well-known studio. I had the prvilege of meeting the two men authors last Spring. This book truly is LIFE CHANGING! Oh...and it takes place in Ft. Worth, TX, of all places! Read it and let me know what you think...love to you!
Live it, go for it and enjoy it every day. It's our life. Sorry to hear of the loss of your friend.
Here is more about the book I was telling you about: http://www.samekindofdifferentasme.com/video.aspx
Also, the author that wrote The Shack is from Alberta, Canada! :)
Red shoes. That's all you need - no new car, no new man - just new red shoes.
I am so glad to hear you are ok. Too many good people are lost in this world.
Love Susan
Dear Mika - I'm so sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. Your friend, my sister-in-law Heather, and so many others are the reason I walked this weekend in the 60 km Weekend To End Breast Cancer Walk. Every time did think I could take another step, I reminded myself of the women dying, undergoing surgeries, enduring chemo and radition.... the walk was nothing compared to what they were going through. Let's hope and pray we lose no more friends or family members to this incideous disease. Love Jude
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